When breaking up becomes a break through.

I have been through several relationships in my many years on the planet. None of them resulted in children. I was in discussion with a close friend who said that her child was the byproduct of her relationship with this amazing man and that the child was the very best parts of him and her. It was that soul born form the two that allowed her to see the very best in him despite the differences. It helped her dig deep into her own being and recognize her power, strength and the gift that she was to the relationship.

For those of us who don’t have children with our partners, our persons or our great loves, when we break up, how do we do that? How do we make the relationship greater than the sum of its parts? 

When we leave, and the pain is great, that pain can become our own birthing process. We are giving birth to our new self. This self, like the child, has  great potential to grow and become a game changer in the society of our own life. We get to allow that relationship, no matter how long or how short to grow us into a more whole, more loving, caring and compassionate individual. It’s our choice. We can become bitter, fearful and angry, thereby throwing the baby out with the bath water or we can nurture and feed the growing sense of Self that emerges on the other side of that experience.

Who we are is far greater than the pain, greater than the dissolution of the two that is now just one. We ARE the love we felt, when we opened our hearts for that love. When we keep our hearts open we open up to loving ourselves more. Loving our very fragile existence in this great cosmos, and truly let love bloom such that all who drink of our nectar will be enriched because of it. Our essence then becomes like honey, sweeting all life we come in contact with. Let that honey permeate our existence so that all who taste fall in love with that which they are, and that which you are, at the core of your being. Throw the bath water out, the drama, confusion, anger, judgment, self and otherwise and keep the baby for yourSelf. 

I know it's a weird picture, I created it because I like it!
Use your imagination to visualize what works for you !

Affirmation: Everyone I am in relationship with and too strengthens and empowers me to experience and express more GoOD in my life in every aspect. I celebrate connections.

www.womenhealingzone.com

Sand flies, Beach tans and Happiness 

August is New Jersey is a big month for vacationers. It’s the month before school begins and the shores are pumping with giggles and laughter and sunshine. This year is the first year that I decided to take an extended vacation. Never before in all my years have I been gone so long. It was often fear that kept me from doing so. The Kundalini Yoga tradition (I’m an instructor Level 1) has a Mantra called the Mul Mantra. The Mul Mantra is a  “root mantra” from which a spiritual foundation is built. There is a word in the mantra that is ਨਿਰਭਉ=nirbho or Fearless. This year I am decided to be more fearless, to live my namesake “God’s gift of Faith” instead of fear. Living in Faith is Amazing and filled with so much Grace! Fearless doesn’t mean we wake up one day and live without it. It means as we are faced with it we feel it and move through the feeling into the Truth. We feel the fear and still move forward. 

My faith took me on a journey, a vacation of three weeks and a deeper development in my Trust in Sources as my provider for all my needs. It was amazing and I feel rejuvenated, refreshed and restored. In fact i’m ready to return to work and ready to put my full attention to what I love. 

Europe has the right idea when they say “we’re on holiday.”  It is a holiday and celebration of life to take time off just to be, to enjoy life and to really Live. So what despite the citronella oil and probably toxic sunblock I still received bites on my arms, legs and back. I can look at each one as a testament to the beauty of the blues skies I laid under and the calm cooling waters I swam in. I can look at my beautiful brown skin now shades darker and know that the vitamin C I received was a natural outcome of fun in the sun! So what my pants are a little tighter and the scale moved up a few notches? I take that as an abundance of joy with mouthfuls of deliciousness! The gym will be glad to have me back in full force! Celebrate it all!!! 

What have you done this summer to celebrate your body? Your family? Your Life? Make time to do something today. If you normally take one day, two days or more off I challenge, encourage and implore you to take a few more. More than you think you can afford too and Trust, Pray and have Faith that you will be taken care of in the process. 

May you be prosperous in Spirit, rich in laughter and blessed. 

Listen here to my favorite version of the Mool Mantra

Prayer

Divine Love/ God's Love/ Goddess's Love,  moves into my frequency and produces vibrations of love. It is the very foundation to my life and as source it is in my breath and my light.  Its resonance and frequency goes out like radio waves and draws to me experiences that support more love. As Divine Love I am fearless. For Love absorbs all things within the atmosphere within and around me and transforms it all back unto itSelf. Only Love is real so only love is experienced. 

Affirmation

Spirit by means of me finds expression as a natural outpouring of my faith.

Becoming a Happy Camper

Step powerfully into the shift and changes this Fall season by becoming a happy camper. If you’ve ever gone camping you know it’s not all sunshine and roses. In fact camping can be very difficult. It can challenge the ego because we are so used to our creature comforts and abilities. Camping challenges our minds to step outside of the ordinary way we see things and challenges us to step into seeing with other senses that aren’t connected to the physical and to find the joy in doing so. 

When I went camping for the first time about 5 years ago it was an immersion trip. I went in hardcore. I tented and bathed in the cold stream. My only creature comfort was the air mattress that I bought with me. Literally that was like my landing pad. If you’ve ever slept on an air mattress then you know it’s no bed and so even that became my opportunity to heal and reveal a greater truth; Happiness doesn't depend on the circumstances. 

During the night the temperatures dropped to below 40 and I was only partially prepared for it. In the night sometimes it rained and the water puddled up in the corners of my tent, while the sides were wet with dew and dripped if I touched it. We woke early in the morning to the beating of the drum in preparation to enter the sweat lodge. Four thirty the drummer made her rounds led by the moon light and a small lantern. This camping trip was no regular camping trip it was a Spiritual adventure. 

We are Souls, Spiritual Beings having a human experience and this human experience is our spiritual adventure.  Just like my camping trip sometimes getting up early in the middle of what feels like the night in the freezing cold is a part of the program. Maybe your freezing cold is the office, maybe your middle of the night is the relatives arriving for Thanksgiving dinner and you are the host. Perhaps your cold splash in the stream is the daily activities that you must preform in order to make things work in your life. Whatever it is, when we stop complaining and start expressing gratitude we can experience a shift in consciousness, a shift in the way we experience our life. 

If Earth is our campground and the Spirit is our natural home, how many ways do we expect the creature comforts of home in this three dimensional world? While camping on the earth we can become happy regardless of whether we are camping in a tent or a trailer. Our happiness doesn’t depend on circumstances. We carry this happiness within us. We cultivate it like I did in the sweat lodge. We develop a daily spiritual practice starting with an attitude of gratitude, we connect with community and we do our part to advance the whole. 

What we think of things becomes internal to how we experience them and what we focus on plants the seeds of what will grow. Learning to become a happy camper is about setting up your tent in the garden of gratitude and bathing in the stream of love. Every day make it your duty, your honor and your privilege to find and focus on the GoOD. Train your mind to do what you want and not the habits that it hold. Happy camping!

Love,

www.womenhealingzone.com

Developing the Compassionate Heart

Developing a Compassionate Heart

getting ready for the holiday season

As a spiritual mentor and New Thought teacher it is important to always be on the lookout for new awarenesses and inspirations. Very likely none of us has to go far to find it when we practice self awareness and introspection. The home, our family of origin and our intimate relationships are a rich source of fertile soil for the breeding ground of healing, revealing and spiritual insights and awarenesses. The more we grow spiritually the deeper the understanding of certain principles are. Compassion is a spiritual principle. Compassion means to walk upon the earth or within the world in such a way that it does not cause another beings unhappiness. I have always understood this and yet in the back of my mind the meaning has taken on a new perspective. In New Thought we teach that people create their own reality and it isn’t “really” us causing another persons unhappiness. This is a fact. Most often it is the persons perspective of what is being shared or said that creates a feeling of unhappiness. I came to an awareness that I have used this as a spiritual bypass, a walking stick I used as a crutch. I wasn’t consciously aware of it. It was like an extra finger or toe that I could sometimes hide with a sock or explain away. This morning it hit me. As I sat with a tightening in my womb, a physical pain. My sacral Chakra was wound up like a cobra or rattle snake waiting to strike.
Compassion KiMani………Compassion means to walk upon the earth or within the world in such a way that it does not contribute to another beings unhappiness. No sooner than a second did the uncoiling of the cobras head move up like the Kundalini rising, another awareness showed up. I  was in an internal conflict because compassion meant I had to “BE” a certain way and at my deepest heart I am a free spirit. I detest being controlled. Unconsciously it looked like I was losing my freedom to be me. I felt the conflict like a tug of war on my Spirit and more Truth glowed like a red hot coal. I was holding the rope. The me that was the petulant child, the teenager who just wanted to have fun, or the twenty year old who thought she was grown just because she left home and the me that was wearing this beautiful white tunic, who is a spiritual leader, teacher and mentor, tethered to the Soul, tethered to the ONE. And my tears rolled down my face and the dam broke open to a greater capacity to love. A deepening of love for myself, the wounded child who felt the need to protect herself growing up as a sensitive soul in this big ol’ world among others who had lost their sense of sensitivity. A deepening of love for others and an ability to sit with their pain without running away, explaining it away or chasing it away. I opened to a new level of Love. Developing a compassionate heart takes courage and a willingness to reflect, allow and surrender to a deepening of the understandings of life. 
Compassion commands us to grow beyond the comfort zones of our own walls and touch the borders of what true humanity means. Compassion means to walk upon the earth or within the world in such a way that it does not add to another beings unhappiness. So today, develop a compassionate heart, let this writing  supply an anchor to the Truth
“Let each disciple tether is so to the compassionate heart and daily define his mission to be first and foremost centered and that hold purging the old order and building the new…….. Let the tenderness of your Heart increase. Purify the heart and the heart chakra. Expand love! Give love! And see how your love joy with others will establish the foundation of the age of Aquarius……….
-Saint Germain 3-23-96, PoW Vol. 39 No.32, pp. 176-177
The name of I AM THAT I AM, I tether my soul to the compassionate heart and daily define my mission to  be first and foremost centered in that Heart.
I seek and find within myself the fount of everlasting compassion. I am joined by spiritual builders who direct the beginning and ending of civilizations.
In the name os Saint Germain, let the tenderness of my heart increase. Purify my heart and my heart Chakra. Expand my love that I may give love and that my love, joined with the love of others, will establish the foundation of the age of Aquarius” 
©1996-97 Church Universal and Truth Inc.

 As women we hold pain in our wombs and the hurt stacks upon one another waiting to strike out at the least provocation that causes us to grow beyond its borders. I got quiet, I listened to the pain, not the words that it can usually create as a defense mechanism. I listened from the crown of my head where the Truth of awareness sits. I listened with my brow Chakra where the seat of my soul consciousness sits and I felt my heart contract then expand and the light from within showed up. Like a movie reel floating across the screen of my mind softly the words melodically echoed. 

The boundaries of Love

Positive Post a Day #91
For those of us who've experience sexual abuse and have issues with creating healthy boundaries creating the boundaries can feel intimidating. We haven't had a clear sense of what ours is to protect, especially if you felt unprotected. On a very deep level the abuse taught us that we weren't entitled to personal space because it was our very own person and space that was violated. We often see people who have clear
boundaries as mean, guarded or aloof. Inside our soul is crying out for us to stand up for them.

I have often gone around unconsciously allowing people to violate my personal space. Even when I felt uncomfortable, taking small steps to create distance between me and them I  didn't challenge it when the space was trespassed upon again for fear of appearing mean or making the other person uncomfortable. I also in turn violated others personal space, not valuing or understanding their want for distance. I labeled them as uncaring, mean or I felt rejected.

Boundaries are necessary. Creating boundaries is healthy and a necessary part of the process of healing the inner wounded that has created a chasm between you and self worth. The value of caring for ourself through creating boundaries reaps plentiful rewards. It fosters self respect, self worth and self appreciation. It allows us to walk the earth as equals. As Responsible BEings fully capable of living life on our own terms. It releases co dependence, judgment and shame. It enables us to walk with our head held high because we Finally Know who we are and our Value comes from inside and we are not defined by anything or anyone
www.kimanidivine.com

Divine VS Animal Nature

This morning as I spent time in meditation my little furry baby joined me. Her name is Mila short for Miracle or Milagros in Spanish. Well Mila came beside me. Her little furry face rubbing my legs. I picked her up and began my breathing routine. Three breaths in, five breaths out. She jumped out from beside me and I opened my eyes, I let her go and closed them again. Three breaths in, five breaths out. She began to scratch the chair I was in. I picked her up, sat her next to me and again began my breathing. Three breaths in, five breaths out. Down she went again. We did this a few more rounds until I decided to hold her close to me. I held her close to my heart and I asked the Universe what the lesson is that she was teaching me. This was the awareness that came to me.

Our animal nature and our Divine nature exist side by side. The animal nature will always be fidgety and indecisive. Angry for some and aggressive in others. The animal nature will always want and need and perhaps fear. The animal nature plays the game of not enough, too much and mine verses yours. In all of that, “We” have choice. When our animal nature shows up we can either dismiss it or embrace it. When we embrace it with love and compassion we bring our Divine nature to it. When we hold it close to our hearts and cover it with unconditional love instead of judgment  we tame the beast and allow both to exist. We stop the separation of God and man and Become ONE SUBLIME ENERGY MANIFEST IN FLESH! We merge the two and our life becomes ONE with all that is. We transform the mundane moments into manifest Miracles. We no longer separate ourselves from the other. We no longer separate our Spirit from the flesh ; We Transcend the Whole body and Soul into Light and Love. We Love, not war. We make Peace, not anger. We make the ideal of Freedom and Justice for all a reality, not just an ideal. 

So the next time your animal nature shows up in your lap, try embracing it as it is without judgement. Hold it in your arms and see what it is really asking for. Do you need more attention? Do you need more love? Do you need to be heard, seen or recognized? Then offer it to yourself. Offer yourself unconditional love in the moment and watch the Miracle of Transformation become an Ordinary experience, because it is. 

Learn to Meditate

I AM WHOLE

Yesterday I had to be reminded by a woman I consider powerful and dynamic that what she saw in me is the same. I had to be reminded of my power, and value and worth. I had been having a bad “day”. The other day I have found out something about myself that I am in complete judgment about. I told her that “I am f**ked up”. What she said to me was that “I am not f**ked up. I have f**ked up days.”

Those words were exactly what I needed to hear. I have been going around making my whole life to be f**ked up when this was just a moment in my whole life. I realize I have done this often and Iyanla say’s if you do it anywhere you do it everywhere. I have often made everything bad when one “bad” thing happens as well as everything good when one “good” thing happens. I am especially prone to this particular style of thinking, the creating a duality, the either or complex, because I am a Gemini and we are the twins. My whole life I have been able to see both sides to every situation. Needless to say it has caused me great challenges in making decisions.  I see now that I have been living an either or life when truly there is room for both. I see now how creating an either or vision of the world has caused me great pain. I have taken a wonderful gift and used it against myself. I have sinned. The gift of duality is the gift of polarity and in the understanding and accepting both as one I find my balance I have been searching for. I think about the “coin”. It has two sides. Neither side is better than the other yet when you look at it for what it is, it doesn’t matter which side is up it’s still a coin. The coin is also likened to our life and how we spend it will depend on its value and worth. We are the only ones who can determine that. All of this is a lesson to accept myself exactly as I am in any moment. Not suspending judgment, giving it up all together; laying down my sword and shield and finding my innocence right where I am and in that moment recognizing that “In my defenselessness my safety lies”. (ACIM Lesson 153)

So I ask you too to look at how you judge yourself and in finding judgment you break off a piece of your own self-worth and diminish your value? How, in accepting yourself, the good, the bad, the ugly and the beautiful you can you have a richer more fulfilling life? How does, how you show up for yourself accepting you exactly the way you are open the door to accepting others exactly as they are?  What are the possibilities of laying down the sword of judgment and the shield of defensiveness? Perhaps this is the weapon of mass destruction we should all be looking for. This weapon is the destructiveness that keeps brother pitted against brother and sister against sister. It is the weapon that makes war and destroys the value of the being which causes the rotting stench of doubt and insecurity to rise like gangrene in the spirit and pollutes the love that is already there. STOP the violence of self-hate in any form and let love be the healing salve that mends the hearts back to its original form, whole.

 

Prayer:

My Great God Presence above and within me, My Beloved I AM presence

I acknowledge that right where I am you are and where you are all is well.

I acknowledge that in me exist a duality of the Divine feminine and Divine Masculine.

I acknowledge in me there is a duality of that which I find acceptable and that which I judge as not

I admit that this vision is a construct of my humanity and that in my divine state I see its wholeness. Today I accept my whole being and fill the holes with unconditional love and self-acceptance. Today I accept that when I separate myself from you I am frightened and I can only see my fear. Today I accept that as I cleave to your bosom I find the nourishment and comfort to be able to see through the duality into the truth… I AM Whole prefect and complete in every aspect of my being.

I release the need to separate myself from you and I become fused in me as I AM one with all…. The Creator and the created.

 

In this moment I give thanks and surrender the process of this continued unfolding to you. Amen and Ashe’

A Souls Purpose for Lemons

In life the lemons we receive are the challenges, difficulties, trials and errors we experience. Sometimes these experiences happen in small batches like the first buds on the lemon tree; the small potted lemon tree on your patio or in your backyard. And sometimes they happen like the orchard in groves and groves of happenings too quick for us to make sense of.

What do you do with that small batch of lemons better prepare you for how you deal with an orchard. In life the tests and trials are given to us in perfect measure with our capabilities to handle them. This is what the bible means in 1 Corinthians 10:13 about not having put on you more than you can bear”.

In our quest for more in life, more happiness, more health, more wealth, more success, more fun, more joy, more free time, more, more, more, each of these more things comes with responsibilities. Each more wealth comes with greater responsibilities of how to handle not just the wealth but the challenges that come along with being wealthy. Each more health comes with it the challenges of what to do as a result of the health you receive. Each more free time comes with the responsibility of how to make use of the time you already have. When we aren’t able to accept and properly deal with the challenges at the level we are at by making lemonade with the lemons we are unable to move forward and accept the more that we desire. The more of contains more of everything you have now and then some.

Life gives us lemons to make lemonade is not a new sentiment. Your life contains your Souls purpose. When we look at life from a Soul perspective we rise above the mundane day to day occurrences of the things we encounter and see the orchard for what it really is. We see the magnitude of our decision to be incarnated to bring love to each and every situation. Love is what makes life sweet. Love is the sugar to the lemons of life that makes the lemonade. When we are able to make love to the situations and experiences, life becomes sweet and we can then take the bitter with the sweet and enjoy both equally.

How do you make love out of the lemons you are given?????????

When you are able to love the bulb and the tree, when you can love the lemons in your own backyard you will be given an orchard view of what is already yours. The Soul longs to be engaged in your life from a place of conscious awareness. It is when we can rise above what it looks like in the muck and mire were we are standing and see beyond the mud to the tops of the trees. Our Soul has this perspective. The Soul longs to show us how we can see it from a different view. It will not come into our conscious mind without an invitation, even thou it sits on our shoulder waiting to broaden our perspective. The Soul is evolutionary and contains all that you need to be able to make love in each situation. The Soul doesn’t just quiet the war it declares a cease fire and dismantles the weapons of destruction by applying a salve that has the power to transform everything in its path to be more like itself.

The tools we have been given to cut open the lemon and squeeze out the juice is the hand and knife of prayer and meditation. Prayer is the knife that slices open the sour and astringent, tart and tangy bitter and acrid expressions of our fear and doubt, anger and negativity that is housed in our limited view of what is being experienced. Meditation is the tool that stills the mind long enough to make an intelligent decision. It raises the mind above the clamor and noise of our small self into the Presence of MIND as our Higher-Self; the Orchard View. Here the Souls is in direct communication with the self to make a loving choice in the moment.

This holiday season and every day of the year take a Soul-filled look at the experience and make love to the situation by allowing your Soul to guide you. Place your sour expression, bitter comments and anger on notice that their days are number with love.

Today’s Affirmation:

I choose to make love to life by being love in every moment.

Crossing the Line

Sometimes we cross the line with people. We may say something out of turn or inappropriate causing the conversation to feel immediately uncomfortable. The easiest way to cross back to the appropriate side of the line is to immediately recognize your mistake, leave the guilt behind and offer an apology. Handling it in this manner builds self confidence, creditability and respect. How can we do this in matters of LOVE?

When we cross the line in love we move from love to hate. I often ask myself how is it we can be so in love one day and so in hate the next. Love does not work that way. Egos do. When we cross the line in love the same rules apply. The easiest way to come back to love is to immediately recognize that you are standing on the wrong side of the line, leave the anger and blame behind and offer an apology to yourself for forgetting that you were once in love with this person and they once were in love with you. Remembering that even though you may no longer be in love with them that the love you felt with them was the love you already had inside and it is still there. With that realization you can “Cross the line” and step back into love.

Thought for Today:
I acknowledge that sometimes I act out of pain instead of acting out of love.

Today’s Affirmation:
I choose today to stand on loves side of the line. I stand in love for Love!

Love the Gangsta

Anger for me has always been a shield that gave me the power to do what I needed to do but the truth is doing things with love is more powerful than anger could ever be. It takes courage to be kind and respond with love in the face of any challenge real or imagined. So today, I lay down my sword and shield and study war no more. I embrace the teachings of Christ who teaches love unconditionally. I allow myself the opportunity to practice love in every situation realizing I may make mistakes. I accept myself exactly as I am and treat myself with love when I do make mistakes.
I was away at IVISD (Inner Vision Institute for Spiritual Development) summer intensive program last week and the beloved Mother Iyanla Vanzant called me gangsta. For those of you who know me some may say it's accurate but most would not think it is true. Today I realize that like a gangsta I was always at the ready. always willing to defend myself against all manner of attack real or imagined. The truth is until today I used anger because I did not have the courage to stand in love. Today I take a stand for myself within myself for love. When I do this I can not help but to respond in love to you. I remember the bible verse when Jesus says if your brother hurts you to offer him the other cheek. (I used to think he had to be off his rocker for doing that ) What I realize now is that this offering is not about allowing yourself to be hurt again, it is the message to always respond in love and with love.

Thought for Today:
Anger has it's place but Love has every place.

Today Affirmation:
I accept love as a response to any situation to experience love in every situation.